Waiting is hard. Even when you're waiting for something terrible like your little baby boy having surgery. All you want is to be done with it. To know when it's going to be over.
When we got a date for his first surgery it was so bittersweet. I was happy to have an end date, but knowing when it was going to happen also made it much more real. All I could think was that he really had to go through with it. That there was no turning back. At the same time, I was glad to know when it would be over.
But it wasn't over. Even in those first few moments when I saw him right after his first surgery, doubt started creeping in. I felt that something wasn't right, but I pushed it aside as paranoia. Unfortunately, I was right and would find out that he would need to go through surgery all over again.
I waited for months to find out when his next surgery would be. I had an idea, probably in September, but it wasn't concrete. I just wanted to know when this nightmare would finally end. When could I finally forget about cranio and not have a surgery looming in the distance?
Yesterday I got the news that Jesse had been scheduled for reconstruction #2 on Aug., 29, 2012. It was a huge relief. After almost a year of non-stop cranio and feeling heartbroken over what my little boy has to endure, it was like someone had turned the light on. Finally, I can see the end of the tunnel.
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